


I'm a Landlady, Get me Out of Here.

by Fanfic_Annie



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Corporate, Developing Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-21 01:33:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17633558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanfic_Annie/pseuds/Fanfic_Annie
Summary: Charity works for a large corporate organisation and has hit her glass ceiling.  She hopes that working with Vanessa Woodfield, local consultant will keep her interested.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hmmm. I've written an AU about our two lovelies. I've tried to keep them true to character but I've maybe taken a little leeway in places. Anyways, hope you enjoy,

Charity was bored. She was trying to remember a time when she had been more bored. She couldn't. Even doing that was boring her. She sighed, looking around the meeting room at the windbags in grey suits and wondering how a bunch of people could spend so much time saying so much about so little. People desperate to express their opinions but not interested in actually doing anything. 

She couldn't concentrate on the wafflings of the stuffy old gits. Instead her mind wandered, to somewhere else, anywhere rather than here really. Nowhere in particular, just somewhere else, with other people, in other places, doing other things. Oh, to be anywhere but here.

"So I think that we should organise another meeting to discuss this further, in the meantime can we find someone to do a deep dive into the issues and come to us with a presentation? Charity?" Her attention was swiftly brought back into the room.

"Erm, yes Eric. Who do you suggest?" She stalled to give herself time to figure out what the hell they were going on about. 

"Oh I don't know. One of the minions."

Do you mean our graduate intake?" Charity gave a sweet smile, which didn't reach her eyes. "I can certainly ask if one of them would be interested in picking this up. It could be a good opportunity to get to grips with the business."

"Yes, fine, whatever," Eric had lost interest now it wasn't about him. "So get that meeting organised for a couple of weeks. Sort out a date with my secretary - I'm very busy you know."

"Yes Eric, leave it with me." Charity shuffled her papers together with a sigh and got up to leave the room. Everyone else lingered, discussing seemingly important and secretive things or checking their phones for crucial messages from people who couldn't do without them for an hour. Charity couldn't be bothered with all of that, there was no one there that she could give two hoots about and to be honest she'd just had enough.

She went back to her office. The Department Secretary, Leyla, was waiting for her with her coat and a sympathetic smile. "Hey. How was your meeting?"

"Oh. A load of old shit. As expected. What have I got to do before I leave?"

"Nothing. I've cleared your diary so that you can get away early. Take your time driving down there and maybe grab some quiet time in the hotel before everyone else gets there."

"Chance would be a fine thing. What the hell is it I'm going to anyway? And where?"

"It's the quarterly Division update meeting. The top 200 managers getting together to network and, well, listen to the boss tell you all how you're doing, then get drunk, and network some more."

"Great. 200 people and not one of them I'm interested in networking with. Is there a spa there? In the hotel? Could I just go and spend my time in there?"

"Well you could, except they'd find you and probably join you. Do you really want to be stuck in the sauna with the naked Senior Management Team?"

"I can truly think of nothing worse. Ugh, now I really don't want to go," Charity took her coat from Layla. "But if I sneak away now," Charity glanced round the office to check that no one was bearing down on her, "then I might just get a bit of peace before the madness starts. Thanks Layla."

"Pleasure. Now get going before anyone spots you," Layla handed Charity her bag and ushered her towards the door.

\--------------------------------

Charity was in the bar enjoying a glass of red. It was the first thing she had enjoyed all day, if not all week, if not all month. She considered it a reward for sitting patiently through the afternoon's presentations. The stirring global update from the boss, the charming Sales Director's pitch that had you nodding with agreement throughout, then wondering two minutes after he had finished what exactly he had said. The jokey HR Director talking about something that didn't relate to the business at all as far as Charity could see. As if he didn't spend all his time dealing with complaints from the younger female staff about the MD's wandering hands. 

She had sat quietly through The Strategy Director's presentation, in which he outlined all her work as if it was his own. As if it was him that had spent the last 3 weeks convincing the Board that her ideas would keep the company at the forefront of the market and sustain them into the future. It wouldn't surprise her if he truly believed that it was him that had sat up until 2am every night for the last week writing the Board paper to support her proposals. That it was him that had to stand in front of the Board while they joked about her dress and her shoes and her hair and her figure instead of listening to her presentation. And then shouted at her and ridiculed her and tried to shame her for what she was saying even though it was right. It was fucking right. And they all knew it. But they couldn't tell her that. Instead they told her they would work something else out and she was dismissed from the room. 

What she had heard this afternoon, however, was her complete proposal being presented as the Board's picture of the future. No credit to her at all. Not a mention. And to be honest, it stung. She felt petty, and small. She knew they relied on her to come up with the things they were too thick to figure out themselves. She knew how useful she was to them. And she knew that it served them best for her to be outside the door waiting to come in, rather than being allowed to be one of them. She had hit her glass ceiling and didn't know what to do about it. And the frustration was killing her.

She sighed and drained the rest of her glass. She deserved a second glass of wine for staying there, for not getting up in the middle of it, shouting at them all to 'fuck off' and just leaving. Rising, she excused herself from the bunch of dullards she was sitting with and wandered over to the bar to order herself another drink. She leaned on the bar top and rested her foot on the rail at the base of the bar, enjoying a moment of peace.

"Hi Charity," a bubbly voice sounded next to her. She turned her head and smiled, the first genuine smile that had crossed her lips since she had arrived. 

"Oh, hey, Vanessa. Do you want a glass of wine?"

"Go on then, I'll have what you're having," she pointed at the glass that the barman was putting on the bar in front of Charity.

"Another one of those then, please," said Charity to the barman, then turned back to Vanessa. "So. Nice to see you. How are you? I didn't know you'd be here."

"Its my first time. My boss said I should come to meet people and start to get myself known in the business."

"Right. I guess you haven't been here that long to know loads of people yet. How are you finding it?"

"I'm in my third month. And... can I be honest?"

"Of course, anything that's said at the bar stays at the bar." Charity picked up her wine to take a sip, catching Vanessa's eye and winking at her.

"Well, its a bit dull isn't it?"

Charity spluttered into her glass. "You can say that again, Kid. One time we were here and we had to find 3 things in common with the people sitting next to us on either side. I couldn't find anything in common with either of them. Not one damn thing. And I may be wrong but I don't quite believe it's me that's the dull one." she looked Vanessa straight in the eyes and quirked her eyebrows. 

"Oh, God no. You're not dull at all." Vanessa flushed. "I mean..."

"It's ok," laughed Charity. It was only 2 people. Any more and I might have got a bit paranoid. But generally I like to think it's them," she nodded her head in the direction of the crowd behind them. "Anyway," she continued. "Tell me about you. What's going on in your life?"

"Work or home? Oh, work, well, its ok. I think it's better here than at my last place. There's more opportunity anyway. But it's a big company you know. Its easy to get lost. And not stand out."

As Vanessa chattered away, Charity felt her shoulders relaxing for the first time in what felt like forever. She eyed Vanessa carefully, weighing up what she knew about her. Vanessa was smart and Charity found her interesting. The few conversations they had had to date had been genuinely stimulating, Vanessa had an exciting perspective, an enticing energy and a keen brain and she enjoyed talking to her. Looking at her now over the bar she noticed that she was quite beautiful, her long golden hair pulled tightly into a ponytail which on anyone else could look childish but on her looked, well, tempting. As if she was deliberately holding it back to contain it, and herself, but should it come undone and her hair hang loose, then all sorts of wildness could follow. And her smile, her smile was made of pure happiness, leaving Charity yearning to be the object of it, the cause of it. She would willingly drown in it, go down without a murmur, all that happiness solely focused in her direction. Yes, tempting. Definitely tempting.

With effort she dragged herself back into the room to listen to what the object of her musings was saying. 

"So, all in all, I'd really appreciate someone to chat to every now and again to help me figure stuff out. You know, sort of like a mentor but more informal. Like a buddy maybe. Or perhaps just a friend." Vanessa dried up and looked at Charity, biting her lip, her big blue eyes full of nervous anticipation.

"Who me? Well, yeah, sure I...I don't know what help I can be but I'm happy to listen and help if I can." Charity was startled. She wasn't sure she had it in her to help someone forward their career when she was so fed up with her own. But she was feeling drawn to Vanessa, more drawn than she had felt to anyone in a long time. And she could feel her heart start to quicken at the thought of them spending more time together. "Ummm, do you want to grab a seat and chat a bit more now..."

"Ah, Charity, there you are," the Managing Director's voice boomed out across the bar. "I've been looking for you. We're all talking about that last presentation and I seem to remember you helping Joe with it. So come and join us. Do. It's boring over there with all the suits and we could do with a bit of skirt to liven things up."

Charity flinched as he squeezed her shoulder and held onto it a little tighter and a little longer than he should. "Sure, Graham. We should definitely continue this conversation though, Vanessa. Maybe later, yeah?"

Vanessa smiled sadly, disappointment clouding her eyes. "Sure. See you later." She turned and walked over to a group of her colleagues and sat down with them. Unsmiling. With a sigh Charity followed her boss, steeling herself for what was to come.

\------------------------

After a couple of hours she really was done. She considered that she had stayed long enough to do no harm and could now excuse herself and go to bed. She finished her glass of wine and stood up. "Gents, you've done me in. I'm off to get my beauty sleep." There were catcalls and jeers from the table, the management team hadn't held back on the alcohol consumption - as they never did when the company was paying. A final bit of banter (at her expense) and she managed to extricate herself with no lasting damage done. 

She wandered over to the lift and pressed the call button, hoping that she'd be left alone to get to her room uninterrupted. The Ops Director had jammed a note with his room number written on into her hand as she left the table, with a whispered "Come see me later, if you like." She was slightly sickened by it all and wanted to sink into the bath and then bed.

The lift arrived and she hopped in, pressing the button for her floor and willing the doors to shut. Just as they started pulling together she heard a familiar voice, albeit more slurred than earlier. 

"Hold the lift. I'm coming. " 

She pushed the open button before she knew what she was doing. The lift doors slid open to reveal a highly dishevelled Vanessa, grinning like a mad thing and slightly wobbling on her heels. 

"Charity. Hurrah," cried Vanessa, rolling into the lift and almost falling onto Charity as the lift doors closed. Charity's arms raised around her as she stumbled and giggled as they crashed together. 

"Steady there, Buttercup," said Charity. "How much have you had?"

"Well it was soooo boring after you left, and the guys were all crapping on about company cars or some bollocks, so I guess I just lost track of everything. And now here we are." Vanessa made no move to pull away from Charity and seemed quite content to be held by her as the lift ascended, leaning further into her and closing her eyes. "I am soooo tired."

"What's your room number, Babe?" Charity didn't trust Vanessa to get there on her own.

"415. I think. Or maybe 647. Or 832. Or maybe not."

"Your keycard, Vanessa?" Charity took Vanessa's bag from her and fished around until she found what she was looking for. "415. You were right. And now we're at floor 8. My floor."

"Ooh. Are you propositioning me?" Vanessa fluttered her eyelashes at Charity. 

"No. Certainly not with you in this state. If I proposition someone I like them to be able to remember it the next day, thank you. Let's get you to your room." Charity laughed as she pressed the lift buttons again and the lift started its descent back down to floor 4. 

"I'd like you to be my friend Charity. Will you be my friend? I like you, You're the nicest one here." Vanessa poked Charity in the hip. "Say you will be my friend. Charity, pleeeease?"

"Yes Vanessa, I'll be your friend. Now come on." Charity hauled Vanessa out of the lift and towards her room. 

When they got inside Charity went into the bathroom to pour Vanessa a glass of water. When she came back into the bedroom Vanessa was slumped face down across the bed. Charity smiled as she poked her in the back. "Oi. Don't go to sleep like that, come on." She pulled Vanessa by the shoulders as with a grumble Vanessa shuffled up the bed so that her head was resting on a pillow. She started to fumble with her clothes, trying and failing to undo her dress. "Come here," said Charity, pulling the zip down and encouraging Vanessa to lift up while she manoeuvred it off her body. "This is far too nice to sleep in," Charity opened the wardrobe and hung the dress up, turning away while Vanessa scrambled under the covers.

Turning back to her, Charity leaned over Vanessa to check she was breathing. She stroked her forehead, brushing her fringe off her face and without thinking leaned down to drop a kiss onto it. Before her lips reached their intended destination Vanessa reached up and grabbed Charity's head, pulling her lips onto hers. A soft, gentle kiss that sent a spark of electricity straight to the pit of Charity's stomach. Finishing the kiss Vanessa moved Charity's head inches away from her face, looked her in the eyes, murmured "I love you, Charity," did a tiny burp, rolled over and went to sleep.

Charity stood up, feeling dizzy. She slipped out of Vanessa's room and went back to her own. She lay awake for a while, trying to process all that had happened that day. She went through it all, piece by piece, trying not to get distracted, but finally giving in and falling asleep thinking of those lips touching hers....

\--------------------------

...and she woke up thinking of them too. Except in her dream that wasn't the only part of Vanessa that was touching her. In her dream Vanessa's lips were on hers, as was her body, on top of her, pressing her down into the bed, her hands exploring parts of Charity that hadn't been explored by anyone other than herself for a very long time. 

She opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. She felt a thrill of excitement pass through her, a long-forgotten and unfamiliar feeling. She tried to convince herself that it was due to the new project the Boss had asked her to head up last night. But deep down she knew it wasn't that that was sparking the flame in her belly. It was what had happened after she had left the bar.

Telling herself not to be so stupid over a drunken moment that probably won't be remembered anyway, she hauled herself out of bed, showered and dressed and went down to breakfast. She hated breakfasting at these events. It was full of people crowing about how much they had drunk the night before and how hungover they were, like it made them special. Or having really important breakfast meetings and rushing around talking to everyone because they were so important, then leaving the room dramatically shouting into their mobile phone. Charity liked to take her time waking up and wasn't particularly sociable in the mornings. She wanted to sit on her own and wondered if she could get away with it. Or maybe Vanessa would be there and they could continue their interrupted meeting from last night. 

In actual fact the dining room was pretty empty. It was still early and the main crowd hadn't surfaced yet. She sat at a small table and munched on some toast. She wasn't really hungry. Halfway through her breakfast she wrote a text to Vanessa. 

"Missing you at breakfast. Want me to bring you some?"

She deleted it. Inappropriate. Still, she told herself she was worried - she didn't want Vanessa to miss today's workshops. Finishing up she grabbed a cup of coffee and a croissant and headed up to the fourth floor. Knocking on Vanessa's door she heard the shuffling of sheets, a grumbling voice and slowly the door opened to reveal a dishevelled Vanessa, wrapped in a sheet, make-up smeared all over her face, looking decidedly the worse for wear, and decidedly gorgeous, thought Charity, whose heart skipped a beat when their eyes met.

"Charity," croaked Vanessa. "What are you doing here?"

"Well I figured you'd need a coffee to get going this morning after last night so I've brought you one," Charity swept past her into the room. "I thought I might have to dump you in the shower to sober you up but I guess you can manage that on your own."

"Yes, I'm fine thank you," retorted Vanessa, who clearly wasn't as she swayed against the door, putting her hand to her head and groaning. "Oh God, how much did I drink last night?"

"Probably a bit more than is good for you on a school night. Drink this," Charity handed her the coffee. "It's super strong. Then hop in the shower and you'll be right as rain. There's something to eat too - it might soak up some of the alcohol," she put the croissant down on the side.

"Thanks," Vanessa sat on the bed, sipping the coffee. "Oh, that's better. How did you know..."

"I met you in the lift, Babe. You were a bit wobbly so I made sure you got back to your room safely. You never can be too careful in a hotel full of horny businessmen away from their wives for a night." Charity felt relieved that Vanessa obviously didn't remember what had happened the night before. Although a part of her, a part that she really didn't want to look at right now, was disappointed. That part that wouldn't shut up, putting visions in her head of swiping the coffee cup across the room and pushing Vanessa down onto the bed, unravelling the sheet that was covering her body, finding those lips again and.... 

"Well, drink that and get yourself together and I'll see you downstairs in a bit yeah?" Charity cleared her throat, her mouth inexplicably dry, and moved towards the door. 

"Thanks Charity, see you later," Vanessa called after her as she hurried out, pulling the door firmly shut behind her. She leaned on the wall opposite Vanessa's door for a moment, eyes closed, face pointing up to the ceiling, lips sucked into her mouth. Opening her eyes she popped her lips, sighed and walked back to the lift to start her day. 

\------------------------


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls start working together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't want to post these too quickly as I have't finished the last chapter yet. But quite frankly I'm sick of looking at it, so have at it.

Charity was halfway through her second glass of wine when she heard the door go. A breezy "Hi, Babe" was shouted through the hall and her girlfriend appeared at the kitchen door, smiling a bit sheepishly, to Charity's eyes. "Oh good, wine," said Zoe, reaching into the dresser to grab herself a glass and plonking herself down opposite Charity at the kitchen table.

"So, how was it?"

"Boring. As ever," Charity replied, taking a swig of wine. She eyed Zoe across the table and thought about asking how she had been, but realised she wasn't actually that interested in hearing the answer.

"God, work's shit," said Zoe. "Paddy's been a nightmare as ever and Rhona just lets him fuck about as much as he wants, getting in the way."

"Right," Charity sighed. She'd heard it so many times before. "Of course it is. Have they paid you?"

Zoe had the grace to look embarrassed. "Well, the thing is, Babe, there's not really enough money coming in. And the actors need to be paid otherwise they'll go. So..."

"You're the General Manager, Zoe. You need to be paid too. And anyway, you're in charge of payroll. So the only person deciding not to pay you is you."

"I'm sure they'll make it up to me, Babe."

"And I'll be paying all the bills and feeding us this month then. Again." It wasn't that Charity couldn't afford it on her salary, she could more than cover the two of them. No, it was more the principle of it. Zoe's work was important, in Zoe's eyes at least. According to Zoe, the only two professions worth anything were entertainment and food. Nothing else mattered. So running a theatre company was important. Which made her important. And not being paid for it made it more heroic still, so Zoe thought. She had a lot of the tortured artist in her. Charity got that. And for a long time she hadn't minded that much. 

But she was getting tired of the expectation that she should bail Zoe out whenever Zoe decided that she should. Although Zoe didn't respect Charity's job she was more than happy to live off the proceeds. Charity was beginning to resent Zoe's complacency and her assumption that Charity would fund the lifestyle to which she had quickly become accustomed. And that she would support her choices. Truth be told she was getting tired of the whole damn thing. 

She could feel her irritation rising but didn't have the stomach for a fight so she got up and walked towards the kitchen door. "I'm going for a bath."

"Do you want some company?" Zoe called after her.

"No."

\--------------------------

Charity lay back in the bath and took a sip of wine. She inhaled deeply and blew her breath out through rounded lips. How had she got here? This wasn't where she expected to be at her age. Actually, she reconsidered, it was exactly where she expected to be at 38. She had a good career, had been pretty successful so far, was well known in her profession and was one of the most senior women in the company. She had a settled long-term relationship, which, truth to tell, was more than she ever thought she'd get. She owned her own house and had a company sports car. So all in all she was meeting her expectations. Well, maybe not hers, but someone's.

What she hadn't expected, however, was to feel this way about it all. Instead of being satisfied with her lot, proud of her achievements, she hated it. No, she didn't hate it, she hated who it had made her become. She was bored, and restless. She felt empty, with no sense of purpose - she was pretty sure that if she stopped turning up for work, except for a couple of people's workload increasing it would make no difference to the world whatsoever. It's not like she'd ever had a strong need to change the world for the better, she just wanted to feel like she was making a contribution. And right now she couldn't say that she felt that at all. 

She had spent so long chasing promotions, foolishly believing that with the next one would come ease, understanding, comfort. Instead all she had found was more uncertainty, more competition, more corporate-fuelled insecurity and way more backstabbing. The goal that she had pursued for so long, getting into the board room and having some real responsibility, no longer seemed worth the effort. A seemingly shiny prize that, upon closer inspection, was turning to dust in front of her eyes.

So she didn't really know what to do. No, that wasn't true. She knew exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to get up, get dressed, get into her car and drive away and never come back. She could do that easily and not miss any part of her life. She wouldn't miss Zoe, her dramas, her complacency, the suspicions around her fidelity. She wouldn't miss her job, the idiots she was working with, the constant politicking and second guessing. She wouldn't even miss her mates that much - she hardly saw them now and Zoe had engineered fights with many of them and usually argued with the rest when they were all together, so seeing them had become a bit too much of an effort.

She closed her eyes and let herself daydream for a moment. Imagining going somewhere, away from here, fleeing her dreary life for something exciting, challenging, free. 

Funny thing was, when she pictured herself driving off into the sunset, she wasn't alone. She had a travelling companion with her. One with long blonde hair, a beautiful smile, soft lips. Running off together to buy a pub, somewhere quiet, small. Maybe a tiny village in the north. Somewhere they would never be found. Working side by side, living together, access to those damn lips, that just wouldn't get out of her head, whenever she wanted...

She opened her eyes with a start and shook her head to bring herself back to the present. She couldn't drive off into the sunset - she had a company car and it would have to be returned on Monday. With a rueful smile she drained her wine glass and, stretching out her toe, pulled the plug.

\----------------------------

Shutting the door behind her, Charity sank into her office chair and threw her head back, closing her eyes. She had just finished a meeting with her boss to discuss her new project. One to put the spark back in her, her boss had said. A cross-company collaboration exercise, bringing seemingly unrelated people together to see what innovations they could come up with to improve the company as a whole. No pressure, but they needed results by Christmas. She was to find a mix of old and new employees, from different parts of the business and bring them into her 'gang,' Graham had said.

Oh, where to start? She could start with her first recruit. She knew who that was going to be. She looked up as Leyla knocked on her door, bearing tea. She smiled as Leyla entered and put the mug down on Charity's desk. "You're a wonder," Charity said, picking up the tea and taking a sip. "Lovely. Sit down," she indicated a seat which Leyla plopped into.

"How are you doing?" Leyla asked. "You have a ton of stuff to catch up on, two days out of the office and you'd think it was twenty."

"Yeah. And now I have a whole new project to occupy myself with." Charity gave a rueful smile. "Like I haven't got enough to do."

They talked business for a while, sorting out Charity's diary and deadlines. When they had finished Leyla got up to leave. 

"Ooh, one more thing," Charity tried to sound as nonchalant as possible. "Can you organise a meeting with Vanessa Woodfield over in Consulting? Maybe see if she can do lunch one day later in the week. And book us a table somewhere nice. I have a budget and might as well spend it wisely."

"Sure. Leave it with me." Leyla left her office, closing the door behind her. Charity stared at the wall in front of her, tapping her fingers against the desk. Thinking about those lips again and looking forward to seeing them across a restaurant table. She sighed. She wasn't doing anything bad, it was work after all. She had a professional reason to see Vanessa and recruit her. If her being on the project would make it a bit more bearable then so be it. A tiny, whispery part of her wasn't entirely sure she was doing the right thing, but she was damned if she was going to stop.

\------------------------------

"Hi." It was said quietly, as if it's owner was shy. Which perhaps she was.

Charity looked up from the glass of water wrapped in her hands in front of her, that she had been staring into for the last few minutes, lost in thought. She felt a tiny shiver ripple through her as she caught sight of those full lips smiling at her and her mind flashed back to Vanessa's hotel bedroom and their unexpected encounter.

"Oh, hey. Sit down. Good to see you," she jumped up and stuck out her hand for Vanessa to shake, then laughed a little nervously, unsure why she had. Vanessa grasped her hand and held it for a second, keeping eye contact. Then she let it go and sat down. Charity followed.

"Thanks for meeting me."

"Well I'm not going to turn down a free lunch, now, am I," Vanessa laughed, trying to ease the tension between them. "Especially as the company's paying. I don't get many of those."

"If you come and work in my team I'm sure I can wangle a few more free lunches," Charity had a glint in her eye. "And if that's not a good reason to hear me out and come play then I don't know what is."

"Oh, I can think of plenty of reasons to come and and work with you, Charity," Vanessa lowered her eyes to the table for a moment, then raised her head again. "Tell me more."

And with that they got into work talk, covering a variety of subjects including Charity's new project, how Vanessa was settling in, what she was working on and who she was working with. Charity talked about her progression through the company and without realising it started to open up about her current feelings towards her situation.

"I guess I feel like I've hit a bit of a glass ceiling to be honest. I have been successful so far because I'm different to everyone else. I'm female, for a start, and so I have a different perspective, an alternative way of dealing with things and people from the rest of them. And they like having me around for that reason. I'm better with clients, more friendly, less rutting stag. And people generally like having me around."

"Well that's good isn't it? Gives you an advantage, an edge?"

"Yes. It has done. And I've benefitted from it. But, to go further in the company, I have to become like them. I feel like I have to put down my scepticism and become a proper company person. Doing the best for the company and the shareholders and forgetting everything else. Right now I can speak out if things aren't right and I get away with it, its seen as cute and emotional. But I won't be able to do that any more. I feel like I'm going to have to change to move forwards and I don't know if I can do that. Be who I have to be. I'm not even sure I like myself now," she gave a little laugh. "But I know I won't like myself if I change any more. Particularly not if I do it to get a promotion. Not if I become one of them."

"Well I can see a lot to like about you Charity. People look up to you. They want to be you. And I think you're changing the world every day. I'd like to do that too, but I'm not quite sure I'm there yet."

"And that's why you should come and work with me. It'll get you into every part of the business and is a chance to make a name for yourself. And it'll be fun. God knows we need some fun," Charity grinned at Vanessa and dropped her a sly wink.

"Oh, I'm in. I'll talk to my boss when I get back to the office. But what's in it for you?"

"Honestly, I'm not sure. My boss thinks it'll perk me up. He's noticed that I'm not really ok at the moment and thinks I need a challenge."

"And what do you think?"

"I think I'm running out of steam. I'm a bit lost, you know? I'm not where I want to be. But I don't know if I know where that is." Charity was surprising herself at the candour coming out of her. She never opened up to anyone like this, especially not to colleagues. But there was something about Vanessa that felt easy, comfortable, safe. She had the strange feeling of wanting to reveal her innermost thoughts, her truths. To show Vanessa the real her, even though she wasn't entirely sure who that was any more. She laughed. "Perhaps where I should be is running a pub in the Dales somewhere. Pulling pints for farmers."

Vanessa raised her eyebrows. "Is that what you would rather be doing? Have you done that before?"

"No, never done anything like it. But it pops up in my dreams in quiet moments."

"That's a nice dream. I could do something like that. Although I've always thought about working with animals. Maybe I'll come with you and be the local vet."

"Well there we go, that's sorted then." Their eyes found each other and they stared for a moment, locked together in a moment of intensity neither was expecting.

Vanessa was the first to break eye contact, looking down and picking up her glass of water to take a sip. "What does your partner think about all of this?"

Charity looked down, staring into her glass of water. With a sigh she looked up at Vanessa. "We don't really talk about it," was all she said, falling into silence.

"You're not planning to run a pub together then?"

Charity sat back in her chair and scoffed. "No, I don't think I've ever mentioned that particular dream at home. Wouldn't go down so well."

"Oh, well, I'm flattered that you talked to me about it. And, you know, you can talk to me about anything. You know where I am if ever you want to."

"Yes I do," said Charity with a grin. "And I'll see you at my first weekly project meeting next week then?"

"Absolutely."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls get closer.

Vanessa's phone vibrated on the table in front of her. She picked it up and read the message. "Fancy a drink after?"

"God, yes. Where?" She pressed send and smiled to herself as Charity subtley reached down to pick up her phone. She watched as Charity nodded to herself and typed out a reply. 

"The Ropemakers in Chittern. It's by a lake. Scenic. Not too far."

"OK. See you there."

"I'll just wrap this up."

"...so thanks everyone for coming, I think that's been a really useful first session and we've mapped out a good plan and I look forward to seeing you all next week and hearing about your progress." Charity fake smiled around the room at the suits, gathered her papers together and stood up. Casting a glance in Vanessa's direction she gave an almost imperceptible nod and left. She didn't want to get held up in a conversation that could, quite frankly, go on forever, given how much some of these people liked to talk.

Vanessa was already at the bar when she arrived - despite her best efforts to get away immediately she had been collared by a colleague wanting some help and a big discussion. She'd cut it as short as she could and got out sharply.

"I got you a wine," Vanessa smiled at her and handed her a glass. They turned and walked over to a table next to the window. "This place is lovely. I never knew it was here."

"Yeah," Charity agreed. "I don't bring work people here as a rule. It's too nice to be taken over by them."

They fell into easy chatter, gently teasing and laughing together. After about half an hour Charity realised she was having more fun than at any recent time she could remember. The thought jolted her back into the present. "Oh. We should get going, I guess," she said, while not making any move to get up from her seat.

"Well let's at least finish our drinks first. Do you need to rush off?" Vanessa wasn't prying but was clearly interested in Charity's life outside work, which they hadn't talked about all that much.

"Not really. I don't have much to get home to," Charity replied without thinking. She didn't talk about her home life as a rule, mainly because she knew that if she opened up about it to anyone she would have to face things that she didn't want to face and would then have to take action. And she particularly didn't want to have the conversation with Vanessa who she knew would wheedle the truth out of her. Because that's what Vanessa did. Vanessa made her honest about herself and her life. And where she was right now, that was dangerous.

"I thought you had a partner," Vanessa queried.

"I do," Charity sighed. "We've been together a long time. Too long, probably."

"What do you mean, too long?"

"Oh, you know. Familiarity and contempt." Charity stopped talking and took a sip of her drink, clearly indicating that the conversation was over.

"Contempt kills relationships. Once you go there, it's hard to get back," Vanessa ignored Charity's body language and continued pushing. "Charity, I'm your friend. Talk to me."

A flicker of surprise crossed Charity's face at Vanessa's words, but she knew she couldn't help but spill if Vanessa wanted her to, so she sat back and sighed.

"Zoe's lovely, you know," she started, thinking as she spoke and choosing her words carefully. "But we don't really make an effort with each other any more. We're friends, really good friends, but sometimes I think that's all we are. It's like the spark has died. Like she's got what she wants from me and she doesn't need to try any more." Charity could feel the floodgates open and was surprised that she didn't want to close them again. "It's like we've fallen into complacency and she doesn't seem to want to get out of it. And I just go along with it, you know. I try, at least I think I try, but maybe I don't try hard enough."

"It takes two to make a relationship work, Charity."

"Yeah. And its not really working. We don't, you know." She twitched her head, to indicate what she was talking about. "We haven't for ages. She never wants to. And truth be told I feel bad for even asking about it." She stared into her glass and mumbled, "she doesn't want me any more." She looked up as Vanessa leaned over and put her hand on Charity's arm. 

"It's ok," Vanessa smiled at her. "For what its worth, I think she must be mad, Charity. It's ok," She said again, reassuringly.

"It's not ok, not really," she smiled her gratitude for Vanessa's attempts to make her feel better. "And then when I get back from being away, it feels like someone else has been in my house, in my bedroom. Nothing I can put my finger on, it's just a feeling I get. The energy feels different, you know? And the bed's always been changed." Charity scrunched her face up and barked out a cynical laugh. "I love her, I'll always love her. But I don't think I'm in love with her any more. And I don't know how to get it back," Charity felt a wave of sadness wash over her as she spoke and her eyes clouded. "So that's that," she exhaled and gave a rueful grin. "My sad life."

"What are you going to do?" Vanessa rubbed Charity's arm gently then withdrew her hand.

"I don't know. If I could find the energy I'd leave her but I don't want to hurt her. And what else would I do? Anyway," she said, bringing them back into the present. "We really must get off now. People will be expecting us. Well, you, at least." She stood up, but not before she noticed the glimmer of sadness that flashed across Vanessa's face before she smiled up at Charity.

"That was fun. I enjoyed it. Thanks."

"No, thank you for the drink. Next week's on me yeah?"

"Next week?" Vanessa blushed as she grinned at Charity. "Yeah."

\------------------------

It became a regular thing. Meeting at the pub after the project meeting. They didn't deliberately keep it a secret, at least that's what they told themselves, but they never happened to mention it to anyone and somehow never invited anyone else to join them. It got to the point where they wouldn't even arrange to meet, they just made surruptitious eye contact at the end of the meeting to affirm that they would be there.

They met. And they talked. And they grew close. Learned things about each other that no one else knew. They shared their histories, funny stories, sad stories, happy moments. Then they talked about their hopes and their dreams, remembering the ones they had as children and conjuring the ones they had now, such as they were. 

They started speaking more regularly during the week. First it was under the pretense of work, one or other finding an excuse to call, or email, or message. Then they started calling, on their way to work, on their way home. Just to find out what they were up to and how their day had been.

It was one Saturday morning when Charity realised that things had changed. She was on the train, coming home from a meeting in Paris. She'd stayed over on the Friday night, to go out with friends. Without thinking she picked up her phone and called Vanessa, who answered after a couple of rings.

"Hi, hold on a sec," Vanessa covered the mouthpiece and Charity could hear her speaking to someone. Then it went quiet. After a few moments she heard a door close and Vanessa came back on the line. "Hey," she sounded happy. "How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks. I'm on my way back from Paris and thought I'd say hi."

"Hmmm," Vanessa made a happy noise. "How was the trip?"

"It was fun. The conference was rubbish but a few of us went out afterwards for dinner and we ended up in some club in Pigalle which was full of fire eaters and roller skaters. It was a proper laugh."

"Oh sounds great. Have you got a hangover?"

"Yeah, a little one. I've slept a bit so far this morning. Trains are good for something." She paused and the two fell into a slightly awkward silence. "What are you up to?" she asked, suddenly becoming conscious that it was the weekend and not work time.

"Oh, not much. I'm just getting Johnny ready, we're going into town this afternoon. There's some fete or something on that he'll enjoy. Not that he'll remember it, I can't remember much from when I was two."

"Right. Sounds fun. And what about..."

"Kirin? Oh he'll be down the pub watching the footie, I guess." Vanessa sounded weary. 

Charity felt a little surge of irritation as she always did when Vanessa spoke of her feckless boyfriend. "Oh for God's sake, Ness. You deserve better," she said without thinking.

She heard Vanessa swallow but she said nothing. An awkward silence fell. "Ness, I'm sorry. It's not my business. It's your life."

"No, its fine. I just, it's just hard Charity. I..."

"I know, Babe. Listen, we'll get together next week. We can talk. If you want to."

"I'd like that."

"Ok, well I'd better go. Enjoy your weekend. See you soon."

"Bye Charity."

"Bye. Bye."

Charity tapped the phone against her lips after she hung up. She realised that the call she should have made should have been to Zoe. But it wasn't. Her first thought was Vanessa. "Shit," she thought. "That's not right." But it felt right. She put her phone back in her pocket, leaned back in her seat and closed her eyes, willing sleep to come to stop her thinking.

\------------------------

"Leave it, Charity." Vanessa sounded angry, her eyes flashing dark blue. "It's none of your business. Butt out."

"But Vanessa, it's not ok. He treats you like shit. He's a complete waste of space and this is killing you. You have to do something. Get rid of him. God!"

"Charity, stop. Just stop. You have no right...."

"But Ness, you deserve so much more. So, so much more."

"And what do you know about it, Charity?"

"I know that you're unhappy. I know that he's hurting you. I know that he's not supporting Johnny, leaving you to bring him up alone."

"Charity, he's his father."

"So what, Ness? You're not responsible for his relationship with his son. You wouldn't be with him if it wasn't for Johnny. You know that. So you don't need to be with him now."

"Why do you care, anyway? You're not exactly making moves to get out of your shitty relationship. So I don't think you have any place to lecture me."

"I'm not lecturing you, Ness. I just want..."

"What do you want, Charity?"

"I want better for you."

"And what's that, exactly? Bringing up a kid alone? Trying to hold down a job and manage child care and make ends meet and have no one to help out? That's better is it?"

" I don't know, Ness. It's hard to see how it could be worse."

"Well, sort your own crappy life out before you start interfering with mine," Vanessa leapt up from the table, knocking her half-finished glass of wine over and not pausing as it dripped down the table leg.

"Ness, wait. I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry."

"Just leave me alone, Charity," Vanessa turned, grabbed her bag and made for the exit.

Charity sat still for a moment, gathering her thoughts. Then she got up and followed Ness out of the pub. Ness was opening the door of her car. Charity moved behind her, trapping her between the open door and the car. Ness stood still, her back to Charity, her head hanging down. Charity grabbed Vanessa's arm and pulled Vanessa round. "Ness," she pleaded.

Vanessa turned, lifting her head to meet Charity's eyes. "What?" she asked, simply.

Charity held her gaze for a moment, then leaned forward, dipped her head and kissed Vanessa softly on the lips. "That," she said as she pulled back. "That's what."

Vanessa stared at her, her eyes searching Charity's for something, Charity didn't know what. So she just stood still, looking deep into Vanessa's eyes, her own reflecting her vulnerability, loaded with feeling. They held the moment for what seemed like forever, then Vanessa cupped her hand around the back of Charity's head and drew her forwards, their lips meeting once again. Charity's hands slid around Vanessa's body to pull her close as the kiss deepened, their mouths perfectly synchronised, tongues sliding together.

After a while they stopped kissing and withdrew from each other. Then they just stood, eyes locked, neither saying a word. Suddenly Vanessa moved, pushing Charity away and climbing into her car. "I have to go," She said, pulling the door closed. She fumbled with the keys in the ignition, almost dropping them in her rush to start the engine, and drove away, leaving Charity standing, her fingers coming up to touch her lips. Charity watched the car exit the car park and sighed. She walked to her own car, got in and drove off.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They get it on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, you impatient bunch. Here is Chapter 4. You're going to have to wait for the last chapter cos it ain't finished yet. But I promise you'll have it as soon as it's ready. This should keep you satisfied in the meantime. 
> 
> Enjoy x

Charity opened her eyes as she heard footsteps pounding up the stairs outside the room. She jumped when this was followed by a sharp rapping at the door. She rose from the bed she was lying on and pulled the door open.

"Charity, what the fuck?" Vanessa stormed past her into the bedroom. "What's going on? Where have you been? Everyone is frantic."

"Whoa, Buttercup. Chill your boots," Charity tried to remain as calm as possible in the face of the whirlwind that was Vanessa. "I'm fine. Well, I'm not fine but I am ok. Really, I'm ok."

Vanessa dropped onto the bed. "Oh my God. I've been so worried. I've phoned everyone trying to find you." She looked up at Charity, suddenly noticing that Charity was wearing pyjamas. "What's going on? Why are you dressed like that? You disappeared. After, you know, last week. We didn't talk. You didn't call me. Is this about me?"

"No. Well, yes. Sort of. But no, not really," Charity sank onto the bed beside her. "I just needed some time out. So I signed myself off sick and came here. Then I switched my phone off. Anyway," she continued, puzzled. "How did you know where I was?"

"I didn't. It's Wednesday night. I came here thinking that you might show up. Like normal. When I got here I asked at the bar if they'd seen you and they said you had been here since Monday. So I forced them to tell me your room number and here I am." She got up to answer a knock at the door. She turned back into the room, holding a tray containing a plate of food, a bottle of wine and two glasses. "I asked if you'd eaten and they said you hadn't ordered anything or been down to the bar. So I got them to make you a burger. And we always have a drink on Wednesday night so, you know." She flashed the wine in Charity's direction.

"I'm not really hungry, Ness. But pass it over here. We can share it. And get that wine open." Charity was surprised and more than a little touched by Vanessa's care.

Vanessa brought two glasses of wine over to the bed and sat down next to the plate resting precariously on the edge of the bed. She handed one to Charity. "Look. I wanted to talk to you. About last week...."

"It's ok, Ness," Charity sighed. "You don't need to say anything. I'm sorry, ok. It was a bad move."

"No. That's not what I was going to say. I'm sorry I panicked. It wasn't you. I'm not sorry that what happened happened."

Charity scooted up the bed to rest her back on the headboard. She leaned forwards and pulled the plate up beside her. "Hop on," she patted the empty side of the bed. "Here, have a chip," she pushed the plate towards Vanessa as she shuffled up the bed to lean back, mirroring Charity's position. The two sat in silence, picking at the food and sipping wine.

Vanessa glanced over at Charity. Her hand reached out to brush a lock of stray hair behind her ear. "What happened? Why are you here? Why do you look so sad? Oh, Charity, what's wrong?" as the tears in Charity's eyes spilled down her cheeks.

"I just, I can't do this any more," Charity sniffed. "Its too much, Ness. I hate my life. And I can't do it any more."

"Hey," Vanessa wiped Charity's tears away with her thumb. "Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"I broke up with Zoe. I figured that I shouldn't feel, you know, about someone, you, if I'm with her. So I left her. And then I couldn't go into work and pretend that everything was normal. I don't know if I can ever go back there. So I came here. To figure out what to do. About my job, my life. It's all such a mess."

"And how was it, with Zoe?"

"It was awful, Ness. She was so upset. And I promised myself a long time ago that I'd take care of her, you know? And now I've hurt her. She cried. She proper cried. Sobbed. For hours. I feel terrible. Its the hardest thing I've ever done. She wanted me to stay but I couldn't. So I left. I just left her," Charity broke into sobs as Vanessa pulled her into her chest and wrapped her arms around her.

"Its ok. Just let it out. Its ok." she stroked Charity's head. 'You know," she continued after a moment. "It wasn't ok with her. And its ok to leave her. That doesn't make you a bad person. Its better to do that than to stay and make both of you miserable. At least you both have a chance now to find happiness. Even if it takes some time. You'll both be better off in the long run."

Charity drew away from Vanessa, wiped her eyes and drew her hands through her hair. "Yeah, but where does that leave me now? I can't throw Zoe out of the house, she has nowhere to go. And I can't be there with her, not now. So I'm left here. In a pub bedroom. On my own."

"Umm, you're not on your own, Charity," Vanessa cleared her throat and raised an eyebrow.

Charity gave a ghost of a laugh. "No you're right. You're here now. You're here."

"And I'll stay as long as you need me to."

"Will you now? That might be quite a big commitment, Ms Woodfield."

"Maybe I'm in for the duration."

"Maybe you are," Charity leaned forwards, clasped the back of Vanessa's head and drew her into a kiss. She pulled back slightly, searching Vanessa's face for an affirmation.

Vanessa opened her eyes and gazed at Charity. "Don't stop," she murmured, cupping Charity's face with her hands and pulling their mouths back together.

Suddenly Vanessa stiffened, gasping. She pushed Charity, her hands against her chest, to arms length.

"Ness. What? Sorry, I didn't mean to..."

"No, fool. It's this." Vanessa picked up the plate and put it on the bedside table. "I nearly fell in it. Now. Come here." 

\-----------------------------------------

Charity awoke slowly, her body feeling relaxed and warm and soft and, quite frankly, magnificent. She took a moment to come to, then jerked upright as reality hit and she realised where she was. The woman in her arms awoke with a start.

"Charity! What the...?"

"Ness. It's late. It's nearly 9 o'clock. You need to go."

"What? Oh no, its fine," Vanessa shook her head. "Johnny is with my Dad. He's staying over. I don't need to go anywhere. I thought I might stay here. If that's ok. Not that I knew this would happen when I came here. I texted my Dad earlier so its all sorted." 

"Oh. Did you now?" Charity smiled, which quickly turned into a frown. "But what about..."

"Kirin? Oh, I booted him out at the weekend. Waste of space that he is." She looked sheepishly at Charity. "You were right. I'm sorry I kicked off last week."

"Oh, Babe. I think we're way past that now," Charity settled down against the headboard, pulling Vanessa to her chest and wrapping her arms around her. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah." Vanessa relaxed into Charity's embrace and shuffled to make herself more comfortable. "I should have done it ages ago. I feel great about it actually. He spent all his time chasing wild schemes that never went anywhere. It was exhausting. And expensive. And pretty boring after a while. I was being complicit in his unwillingness to grow up. Maybe he will now and then he can become the parent that Johnny needs. Or not. It's up to him."

"Right. I guess that makes me feel a bit less bad about this then."

"Do you feel bad about this?" Vanessa tensed and crooked her head back to look up at Charity. "Was it bad? Was I bad?" She turned around to look directly at Charity. "Oh God, was it awful? I didn't think it was awful. Was I awful?"

"What?" Charity laughed. "No. Ness, it was brilliant. Amazing. Don't think that. You were incredible. You are incredible. "

"Are you sure?" Vanessa relaxed slightly.

"Yes. Of course. I just meant that I feel bad about Zoe. I only split up with her a couple of days ago. And I felt bad about Kirin. But now I don't feel so bad about him."

"Oh ok. I get that. You can feel bad about all that." Vanessa giggled as she turned back around and settled down in Charity's arms again, her back snuggling into Charity's chest.

"Anyway," Charity assumed an offended air. "If you were really bad in bed, I'd hardly say it, would I? I'd hardly go 'well I feel awful about that because you're a crap shag. Off you go then.' Who do you think I am Vanessa?"

"I think you're smooth, Charity Dingle. Real smooth." Vanessa tilted her head back and reached up to capture Charity's lips against her own. "And I'm glad I was ok."

"Oh, trust me, you were much more than ok, Babe. But, you know, a bit more practice probably wouldn't go amiss."

"Is that so?" Vanessa turned again to face Charity. "Well let's see what we can do about that then."

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charity had been sitting in the armchair by the window since sunrise, her feet perched on the edge of the chair and her arms clasped around her legs, her chin resting on her knees, staring out over the lake and the trees at the awakening world. The rustling of sheets and a small groan alerted her to Vanessa's presence. She turned towards the bed. "Morning, you. Tea?" She released her legs and stood up, pausing a moment to place her hands at the base of her spine and stretch her back, then walked over to the chest of drawers, picked up the kettle and disppeared into the bathroom. When she returned with a full kettle Vanessa was sitting up, the duvet wrapped around her, tucked in tightly under her armpits. Charity plugged in the kettle, switched it on then wandered over to the bed and sat on the edge nearest Vanessa, leaning in to drop a kiss on her lips. "Hey," she whispered. "How are you doing?"

"Good morning," smiled Vanessa. "What were you doing over there?"

"I couldn't sleep and I didn't want to disturb you. So I've just been trying to sort my head out."

"And have you?"

"No," Charity's bubble of laughter was genuine. "It'll take more than a fabulous night with you and a sunrise to figure out what I'm going to do."

"Hmmm. What do we do about that then?" Vanessa's eyes sparkled. "How about a fabulous day with me as well? Would that help?"

"I think it would. But don't you have to get to work?"

"I'm owed a couple of days leave. I've got nothing on today anyway, they can do without me. In fact I doubt they'll even notice I'm not there."

"Ness, I don't want to cause trouble for you. I'm in enough of my own."

"Charity, its fine. I'm a big girl. I know what I'm doing."

"Great. Well I'll make tea and we can figure out how we're going to spend our fabulous day together."

"Why don't we start with you telling me what's been going through your head in the last couple of hours?"

"Oh, I've got a much better idea than that," replied Charity, gently unravelling the duvet from Vanessa's body.

\------------------------------------------

Four hours later Charity was lying on her back staring at the ceiling. Vanessa was dozing, lying on top of her, her head resting on Charity's chest, Charity's hand absently mussing Vanessa's hair. In all that time they had failed to move from the bed. Charity didn't know if she ever would or could. Vanessa inhaled deeply through her nose and raised her head as consciousness invaded her body. Charity lifted her head to place a kiss on the top of Vanessa's. "Hey, Sleepyhead," she crooned.

"Hey back. What time is it?" Vanessa asked through a yawn and a stretch.

"Lunchtime. Are you hungry? We could go downstairs and have some lunch if you want."

"Hmmm. I could eat but that would involve moving and I'm not sure I can do that. What do you want to do?"

"Well, much as I want to stay here with you for the rest of my life, it would probably do me some good to go out for a bit. I haven't left the room in three days. And they probably want to come in and clean it. They've been a bit twitchy with me that I haven't let them so far."

"Ok, well let's go downstairs and eat then we could go for a walk this afternoon. Get you some air. And we can talk."

"That sounds ominous. Have you had enough of me already?" Charity's tone was light but she failed to completely mask the flicker of panic in her voice.

"God, no." Vanessa found Charity's hand and laced their fingers together, bringing it up to her face to kiss Charity's knuckles. "I'm not sure I'll ever have enough of you, Charity. I just meant you could tell me how you're really doing and what's troubling that beautiful mind of yours."

"Oh, yeah, ok," Charity breathed out. "How long have I got you for today, Ness? What time do you need to go?"

"I need to pick Johnny up at about 6. So I'll head off a bit before. But I'll come back tomorrow. If you want me to."

"Of course I do. I wouldn't let you go tonight if I didn't have to. Or how about we meet somewhere and do something together? If you're sure you want to - I don't want you to miss work on my account."

"Charity, What's more important than taking a bit of time out of our lives to fall in love," Vanessa spoke without thinking and looked up sharply when she realised what she had said. "If....I mean....you know...."

Charity chuckled and gave her a squeeze. "It's ok, Vanessa. I know you love me. You've already told me."

"What? When? Oh my God, you remember," Vanessa flushed and buried her head in Charity's chest. " I was so drunk," her voice was tiny and muffled. "I hoped you'd forgotten because you never mentioned it."

"Again, Vanessa, not the sort of thing you can bring up very easily with a colleague. How would you have liked me to do it? 'Thanks for the report on the Disbenefits of Social Media in the Workplace and when you burped in my face and told me you loved me the other night what exactly was going through your mind?' That wouldn't have been awkward at all."

Vanessa buried her head in Charity's chest. "Shut up. I'm so embarrassed. I can't look at you."

"Hey," Charity slipped a finger under Vanessa's chin and raised her head up to meet hers. "Its fine. It was really sweet. And sort of blew my mind actually. I think it's what set all this in motion. And its shit, for me, at the moment....not this....all the other stuff. But it will get better. Its already better. This, Ness, this is better than anything I've known for a long time. Its amazing. You're amazing. So please don't feel bad about it. About anything," she rubbed their noses together and grazed her lips against Vanessa's. 

"Hmmm," Vanessa looked shamefaced, then shook it off and smiled, her eyes dancing. "What time do they serve lunch till?"

"All afternoon I think, Babe."

"Good," she reached her head forward to bring their mouths together. "Cos there's something we need to do first. Just to work up an appetite, you know?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh. A happy ending.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking with it. Hope you enjoyed.

It was Charity's first day back at work after two months off. She had been to see the Doctor who signed her off with stress. She had accessed her private health insurance (one perk of her job) to get some therapy and had been diagnosed with mild depression. Nothing too serious, a product of an unfulfilling life. She knew she had some big decisions to make and was looking forward to making them at the right time. When her head and heart aligned and she could choose her future.

As she returned to her office her phone rang. She smiled as she answered it. "Hello Sunshine. Two calls in an hour? Checking up on me much?"

"I'm not checking up on you, Charity, I was just thinking about you and wanted to know you're ok." Vanessa sounded concerned.

"Thinking about me, huh?" Charity's voice was low and sultry. "What bits of me were you thinking about Vanessa? Lower bits or higher bits? Hidden bits or bits on show?"

"Charity, shush." Charity could almost feel Vanessa's face colour as she scolded her.

"Where are you Ness? Are you on your own? What are you wearing?"

"Shut up," Vanessa giggled down the phone. "Be serious. How are you getting on?"

"Oh, Ness. Its ridiculous. No one knows how to talk to me. Mental health problems allegedly caused by a break-up with my girlfriend. As if anyone here has a clue how to address that. I've just had my back-to-work interview with HR. They're terrified that they are to blame and are just covering their arses. They couldn't give a stuff about me."

"That's rubbish. They care. Of course they care. How are you coping?"

"I'm coping fine, Ness. I am fine. You don't need to check up on me, really."

"Ok. You're brilliant and they're stupid if they can't see that."

"They don't need to see it, Ness. I have you for that."

"Yes you do. Hey. My Dad says he'll take Johnny tonight so how about I come over and cook you a back-to-work tea? Maybe lasagne?"

"That would be lovely. Do I get you for the whole night?"

"Yes you do," Vanessa chuckled. "All night. If you want me."

"I most certainly do. Listen, gotta go. More dweebs to make small talk with. Laters, Babe."

"Bye. Oh and Charity?"

"What?"

"Your rear bits. Always your rear bits."

Charity laughed as she hung up the phone.

\----------------------------------

She held her breath for as long as she could under the water, then scooted upwards, shook out her hair and lay back in the bath. She picked up her wine, listening to the sound of Vanessa cooking and humming to herself downstairs in the kitchen. She thought about how much her life had changed in the two months since she'd broken up with Zoe and acknowledged how much she hated her job. She had thought she'd never get over it but she was starting to understand grief and was managing it well.

She was learning to pay attention to what she was feeling, rather than just reacting to it, so she paused to examine her emotions. She felt calm and safe, dare she say content. She knew a lot of that was due to Vanessa's presence in her life, but she was also finding it in herself too. She was starting to take back the reins of managing her life, and felt empowered to choose her path. She was letting go of doing things because she felt she ought to and was beginning to believe that she could do things because she wanted to. 

She heard a noise in the kitchen as Vanessa spilt something and swore quietly to herself. She smiled at the curse spoken by such a pure voice. She liked the sound of Vanessa in her space. She liked Vanessa. She was falling in love with Vanessa.

They were growing ever closer, Charity had met Johnny and Frank, Vanessa's wayward father. They didn't hit it off, she wasn't sure why, but she figured she'd win him round eventually. When she showed him how serious she was about his daughter and grandson. And she was serious about them. She was in it for the long term. If Vanessa would have her. And so far she hadn't given any indication she felt otherwise. 

They were taking it slowly, giving themselves time to be sure. It could be a rebound thing, Charity wasn't a fool, but she thought it wasn't. She thought they had genuine feelings for each other. And she didn't want to make a mistake. To rush Vanessa, or herself for that matter, into anything. And her life was in turmoil, which didn't help Vanessa's need for stability for Johnny. 

And she needed to sort her job out. She was going to leave the company. She knew that, although she hadn't decided what to do next, and she certainly hadn't shared that information with anyone. She wanted to have some idea of her plans before discussing them. She didn't want to worry Vanessa, or frighten her off.

She felt good about the decision, though. She felt free, positive, hopeful for the future. And that was still a relatively new feeling for her. She was ready to start exploring options.

With that thought, and a glimmer of an idea, she got out of the bath, towelled herself down and shrugged on a robe. Winding a towel through her hair she trotted down the stairs and into the kitchen, where she walked over to Vanessa and snaked her arms round her waist, pulling her back into her chest and dropping kisses along her neck line.

"Hey, you. How are you doing?" Vanessa's hands reached up to grasp the sides of Charity's head as she twisted her neck to kiss the underside of her chin. "You smell lovely. How was your bath?"

"Mmmmmm," Charity nuzzled into Vanessa' neck. "Babe, I had a thought about this weekend. What are you up to?"

"No plans as yet. Why?"

"Do you fancy coming away for a couple of days? I thought we could go up north. Into the Dales. Bring Johnny."

"Um, much as I adore my son, I'm not sure his presence on a weekend away with you would enhance our experience much," Vanessa grinned wickedly.

"Well it's up to you. I don't mind either way. But do you fancy it?"

"Oh I do."

"Ok. I'll sort it."

"And will we be checking out pubs for sale while we're there?"

"Maybe, Babe, maybe," Charity said with a wink.

\-----------------------------

"Oh, there's loads of people in there," Layla came out of the board room, party hat on head and plastic cup filled to the brim with wine in hand. "It looks like the world has come to see you off."

"Oh shut up," said Charity, grabbing the wine out of Layla's hand and taking a large swig. "I don't want to go in there. Do I have to?"

"Charity, it's your leaving party. They're all here for you."

"No they're not. They're here to pick up the pieces. Like chattering hyenas, picking over the carcass. To grab my projects. Get the gossip. Blame me for everything that's gone wrong in the last 10 years. And schmooze with the big cheeses. None of them give a damn that I'm leaving unless it benefits them."

"Ooh, you are cynical. Just get in there," Layla pushed her towards the door. "They're all waiting."

Charity swigged back the rest of the wine, sighed and opened the door. She walked into the board room. As nobody noticed her entrance, she was able to make it over to the table with the drinks on it and pour herself a large glass of wine. She stood quietly and gazed around the room, counting the number of grey suits. And working out if there was anyone here she would actually miss. She decided there wasn't.

"So. Off to pastures new, then?" a slimy voice sounded beside her. she turned to see Eric Pollard, a white haired guy with some boring job title, Head of Productivity or somesuch made-up importance. 

"Yes I am," she replied shortly.

"Couldn't cut the mustard in big business then? Too much for your pretty little head, is it? Oh don't worry, it'll be your hormones. They'll be hassling you to have a baby, you are knocking on a bit. "

"Yes, that's right Eric. I can't cut the mustard. Not the work, you understand. I can do that in my sleep. But it's the people, you know? Can't stand them. Compete bunch of c..." She was cut off by the loud tinkling of glass as the MD stood at the front of the room and called for everyone's attention.

"Right. It falls on me, everyone, everytime actually, to wish Bon Voyage to a treasured and special member of staff." Charity looked down at her feet, praying that the floor would open up and swallow her. She felt Layla sidle up beside her and was grateful for the reassuring hand that was laid on her arm.

"Charity Dingle has been one of our best employees, colleague and, dare I say, friend, rising through the ranks at a searing pace, to become one of the most highly respected and popular member of staff, as the number of people squashed in this room is testament to. I, for one, would like to thank her personally for her dedicated service over the, ummm, many, err, years she has been here. We will miss her style, witty repartee and well, just her general brightening up of our dreary office." He punctuated his speech with a leery wink.

Charity finished her wine and turned to the table to pour another one.

"I understand Charity is taking a complete break from the heady world of corporate business, and is moving up north to do, errr, something completely different."

Charity forced a smile onto her face, and looked around the room, nodding at all those staring at her. Trying not to bolt.

"So, Charity, we have clubbed together and got you a small token of our appreciation. Something to wish you on your way." He picked up a small parcel and waved it in her direction. Reluctantly she walked to the front of the room, bracing herself for what was about to come. She accepted the present from the MD and allowed herself to be drawn into an embrace and kissed on the cheek. 

Slightly reeling from the smell of garlic on his breath, she looked around the room with gritted teeth, then opened her mouth to speak.

"Thank you Graham, for your kind words. I have enjoyed my time here and will miss you all terribly. All I can do is wish you all the luck in the world. And say that if you are ever up north do look me up, I'll be in a small village in Emmerdale running the local boozer."

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket as she smiled amidst the sounds of applause filling the room. She waited a beat, until the clapping had finished and dull hum of voices filled the air again, then walked over to Layla, while fishing her phone out of her pocket. "That's Vanessa. She's outside. I'm off. I'll see you tomorrow. Behave."

Layla winked at her. "Don't worry about me, Blossom, I'm well on my way." Charity watched her sashay over to Pete Barton from manufacturing, shook her head slightly and left the room.

\-------------------------------------

Charity felt a twinge of sadness as she closed her front door for the last time. The Removal van had already left with her stuff, she was due to follow them up the motorway later today. 

"There you go," she handed the keys to the Estate Agent.

"Thanks," he replied, pocketing them immediately in his shiny suit trousers. "What are your plans? Are you buying somewhere else?"

"I'm investing in a pub actually, well half a pub. My cousin runs the Woolpack up north and her partner wanted to leave, so I've sold this place and bought her out."

"Oh. Do you know much about running pubs?"

"Never done it before in my life. But, I figure, how hard can it be? I'm a hard worker and I learn pretty quickly. And I've always wanted to be my own boss. So I'll give it a good go."

"Wow. Living the dream. Well, best of luck to you, Ms Dingle."

"Thanks. Pleasure doing business with you." Charity walked to her car and got in. She heaved a sigh. The next stop was one she was not looking forward to.

\-----------------------------------------

"Hey. Come in," Vanessa opened the door with a smile. "I'm just in the middle of something. Go through to the kitchen and make us a brew. I'll be there in a second."

Charity did as she was bid, then sat down at the kitchen table. She didn't know how she was going to say goodbye to Vanessa. They had made arrangements to see each other when they could, but nothing more concrete than that. And Charity knew that she would have to throw herself into her new enterprise, so she didn't know when she'd get the time to come back. 

It had been the hardest decision she had ever made. But when the offer came from Chas she didn't know how to turn it down. It was everything she had ever dreamed of. But leaving Vanessa, when things were so good between them. She really wasn't sure if she was doing the right thing. She looked up with a sad smile as Vanessa walked into the kitchen.

"Ness..." she started but was interrupted as Vanessa plonked herself down in a chair across the table from Charity.

"Charity, listen. I have something to tell you. I'm coming with you."

"What? Ness? Now? You can't."

"Why not?"

"Well, your job, Johnny...."

"Hmm. What if I said I'd quit my job?"

"What?"

"Yeah. I handed my notice in. Effect immediate."

"Why would you do that?"

"Well, you did. So I thought I would. Follow a dream and all that."

"But....but...what will you do?"

"Well, you know when you were in the back of the Woolpack with Chas, sorting out the purchase details? And you left me in the bar sussing out the locals?"

"Yeah?"

"Well I got chatting to that weirdy-looking couple, from the vets. Rhona and Paddy they're called. "

"Right?"

"Anyway, they told me they were struggling with their workload and they were looking for someone to run the place for them. Like a business manager. So I've been talking to them and they've agreed to give me a go."

"What? What about Johnny?"

"Rhona's got a little one. Johnny can go to the same childminder as Leo. Anyway. The bags are in the back of the car. Along with Johnny's car seat. So the only remaining question is.....Werthers or liquorice allsorts?"

"What?" Charity didn't know if she was coming or going.

"Sweets. For the journey. I got both," Vanessa opened a kitchen drawer and took out two packets, holding them up in front of Charity's face.

Charity smiled and grabbed one of the bags. "Werthers for me, Babe, always." She stood up and grabbed Vanessa, pulling her close. "Are you sure, that this is what you want?"

Vanessa looked up at her. "Yes, Charity. I wasn't happy at work. And I was dreading saying goodbye to you. And, you know, I said I wanted to work with animals. So I get to be with you and do what I want. But.." her gaze tured quizzical. "Is it what you want? Do you want me to come? Am I crowding you?" She made to pull out of the embrace but Charity held her tight.

"Yes, Vanessa. Yes, it is what I want. It's exactly what I want. I didn't know how I was going to leave you. But I didn't know how to ask you to come."

"Well then, we're both going to be happy." Vanessa smiled as Charity pulled her close and kissed her.

\-------------------

Charity adjusted the rear view mirror and looked at the back of the car. Johnny was fast asleep, strapped into his carseat, cuddling his toy rabbit. She glanced to her left, where Vanessa was spark out, snoring gently with her head tipped back against the headrest. 

She smiled to herself, changed up into fifth gear and drove on.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like it, do let me know. Ta x.


End file.
